Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Relax with your friends in The Den.... :satan:
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Jay
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Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby Jay » 22 Dec 2016, 09:34

Firstly, I hope all of the members here have a wonderful Christmas. :D I'd love to know what you're all getting up to over the holidays! I'm just having a quiet & relaxing one at home with my parents. It's been a tough year with ill health in the family so I definitely intend to make the most of this Christmas and really enjoy it. Image

~

I wanted to take the opportunity to let you guys know that I've decided I'm not going to moderate the forum for the foreseeable future. By this, I specifically mean things like: issuing warnings/bans, or intervening with verbal warnings (therefore, I'm not getting involved in any arguments/dramas to try & defuse them - I don't even wish to read through them any more tbh). So I respectfully request that I'm not PM'd to act as a moderator anymore. :hug:

I think many of you would agree that the regularly occurring arguments that take place on DenDen (primarily in the Spice Girls + solo sections) have really spiralled out of control this year. Things can be downright horrible here. Being immersed in this negativity took its toll on me last month, and that's the main reason why I "left" for a few weeks. During that break, I put things into perspective. I feel fine to be visiting here again, but I'm not going to be as active or involved as I used to be. I just want to dip in and out and visit when I feel like it, posting as a Spice Girls fan/music lover/normal user, without added responsibility.

As the only regularly active member of the mod team in more recent years, it's become increasingly stressful and kind of impossible to keep the forum in check, so I don't wish to try anymore. I've realised that I'm not obliged to visit here all the time and moderate, it's been my choice to do that. Just like it's the choice of the rest of the team to not visit here very often anymore. I completely understand why they don't visit regularly... I should have followed their lead really.

In theory, this is how a mod team should work: any issues that arise are discussed between members of the team, with an attempt to reach a majority decision on how to act - a shared responsibility, no pressure on any of us individually. Obviously this hasn't been the case in recent years. Acting alone can lead to inconsistency in decisions made, or even making the wrong decision, due to not having any other input where other mods would suggest it's the wrong course of action. There's definitely been certain situations I could have handled better in recent times, but what's done is done.

Anyway, it's clear that an inactive mod team makes for a troublesome forum. I would ideally like to see a brand new team of moderators. I believe this is ultimately what the forum needs to thrive & survive. It's been discussed behind the scenes for a while on and off, but I'm not sure when/if this is likely to happen.

I hope you all understand where I'm coming from with the decision I've made. I realise this probably all sounds a bit dramatic, because at the end of the day it's just a forum, but nevertheless I care about this place, and I feel it deserves better than what the current mod team can offer. I also feel it deserves better than the constant bickering across multiple threads. Can we try and be more pleasant towards each other in 2017? :p

Thanks for reading! :D Happy holidays. :angel:
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addicted2you
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby addicted2you » 22 Dec 2016, 12:42

Welcome back :) looking forward to chart stats for 2017!
Sorry to hear bout your family, wishing health and happiness to all dendeners!
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James
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby James » 22 Dec 2016, 13:02

Good on you, hun.

DenDen really has gone down the pan. Maybe that's the social media age in general - DenDen was around long before Facebook, Twitter, Instagram et al. People are a lot nastier nowadays, it's very easy to be a keyboard warrior and this forum has plenty, who ruin the experience for all. Ironically, I'm probably a lot nicer now than back then...

DenDen worked well under a structure of "admins", then "mods" then the minion posters. I have had plenty of disagreements with the admins over time - some constructive and some not so on my part, but ultimately I think they all deserve a lot of respect for what they did and do for the community. They were the leadership which this place desperately needs, and strong pillars of the community society.

You're right when you say that it's impossible to moderate alone, and it's been a free-for-all over the past few years and especially few months. In my opinion, a good moderator should be a long-standing and respected member, active on the forum and confident in their decisions, but also fair, consistent and willing to take criticism. If DenDen had a few of those people, working as a team and making majority decisions then I think it would be a far better place.

Unfortunately, I dread to think who would be appointed as a moderator under a democratic vote. The in/out system used previously doesn't work and it amounts to a popularity contest. Personally, I call on the admins to overthrow the current team, choose/approach five or so members they deem suitable, offer them the job and get cracking with sorting the place out.
Last edited by James on 13 Feb 2017, 02:29, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby PeruvianSpice » 22 Dec 2016, 18:48

Welcome back

i understand your feelings and it's nice you've commited yourself to this for a long time but it's logical to want more peace of mind...
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby Stas » 22 Dec 2016, 20:33

Thank you Jay for a great job and everything you have done and Merry Christmas!

I have been on DenDen since the beginning - it has changed, sure, but there have been bullies and negativity since day one. Some users were trolled and bullied by several members (they called themselves a clique) because of their bad English language skills, where they were coming from etc, so I think it used to be much worse when it came to bullying online. There were much more drama and much more trolls.

These days it's more about stupid useless arguements over nothing caused by our favourite group (mostly) (songs and albums leaking aside)), hopefully there will be a new mod team.

Some people just need to realise it's absolutely fine to have an opinion, but it doesn't mean they are right or that everyone has to agree with them. It's hard, because it's hard to grow up and get over yourself.
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby FiaSpice » 22 Dec 2016, 20:43

I totally understand how you feel. It was like that, to a way lesser extent, when I was a mod and it was hard sometimes (I only realised it later)

I wish you happy holidays and hope everyone in your family will be healthy this year.
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JimmyLo
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby JimmyLo » 23 Dec 2016, 04:15

Stas wrote:Thank you Jay for a great job and everything you have done and Merry Christmas!

I have been on DenDen since the beginning - it has changed, sure, but there have been bullies and negativity since day one. Some users were trolled and bullied by several members (they called themselves a clique) because of their bad English language skills, where they were coming from etc, so I think it used to be much worse when it came to bullying online. There were much more drama and much more trolls.

These days it's more about stupid useless arguements over nothing caused by our favourite group (mostly) (songs and albums leaking aside)), hopefully there will be a new mod team.

Some people just need to realise it's absolutely fine to have an opinion, but it doesn't mean they are right or that everyone has to agree with them. It's hard, because it's hard to grow up and get over yourself.


I think along with a new mod team, there should be a reevaluation of the rules. Presently they are too open and allow more disrespect and abuse than what's appropriate (ie calling someone a "cow" or swearing at someone). Lots of things that shouldn't be allowed flies by. We need to set a standard for what we expect our community to be like and, hopefully, this will encourage some people to return knowing the bullshit is being taken care of.
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby Andres » 23 Dec 2016, 05:03

tl;dr
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby Fenrik » 26 Dec 2016, 04:15

So this means there´s a job opening??

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JimmyLo
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby JimmyLo » 26 Dec 2016, 06:16

Fenrik wrote:So this means there´s a job opening??

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Soon, I suspect - in the new year hopefully. I've been working on spear-heading a new campaign for new mods. With it will also come a vote for new rules. Gotta get approval from the admins, etc. I don't want to run for mod, but I wouldn't mind managing a new "election". I'm hoping with someone's help (maybe FiaSpice?), we can have a new revamp on things here and clean up shop and welcome new mods who can help us keep things a little more kosher around here.
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby VivaMGMVE » 27 Dec 2016, 02:20

This makes me very sad, but thanks for sticking around for as long as you have and trying to maintain order on the boards. Its not gone unnoticed. I deeply appreciate the community here and regret that so many members have decided to behave so poorly and be generally awful. I do miss checking in and jumping in conversations like we used to be able to do here with ease (and not have to wade through pages on pages of fighting). I don't have many friends on here as I remember having a few years ago as they've all begun to phase out as well.

Thanks, Jay. I hope your new approach allows you to stay engaged at a level that makes you happy and want to keep coming back ...and happy you were able to spend time over the holiday with loved ones. :)
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby JubileeRoad » 27 Dec 2016, 17:17

Honestly, I think most of you take this way too seriously. I tend to wonder how many of you have lives outside of the internet. It really doesn't seem so when you take to heart what others that you don't know or will never meet in person have to say about you. This place should be a light hearted place to check what Melanie C wore jogging. Not the battle royale you guys make it out to be. Some of you just really need to get a life.
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James
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Re: Happy Christmas! + A message from me re: moderating

Postby James » 31 Dec 2016, 12:46

JimmyLo wrote:I think along with a new mod team, there should be a reevaluation of the rules. Presently they are too open and allow more disrespect and abuse than what's appropriate (ie calling someone a "cow" or swearing at someone). Lots of things that shouldn't be allowed flies by. We need to set a standard for what we expect our community to be like and, hopefully, this will encourage some people to return knowing the bullshit is being taken care of.


The rules aren't the problem, the fact they aren't being enforced is. At the heart of DenDen was freedom of speech but within respectful limits. The rules were there and for those who overstepped the mark, they got warned or banned. There's no enforcement and no punishment anymore, so people are free to do what they like.

I disagree with any user running, managing or having involvement with a mod-election. I agree DenDen needs a refresh, and the community is right to bring awareness to that. But that input needs to come from the admins - who pay for the forums, or Jay, who is trusted for being fair and has great experience of running survivors and votes. Until the existing team turn around and say "meh, we can't be bothered", it's not appropriate and it's not your place to "spear-head" anything.

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